What a shame that up to this point I couldn’t seem to overcome the irritation of being disturbed from shuteye.
The clock is ticking almost 3 and I’m way too awake.
Those sleep-deprived nights could be overlooked as it could never be compensated.
The idea of getting even is too tempting.
Right now, it’s a fantasy of losing my manners.
instinctively, a threat is lurking somewhere. and it’s paralleled by dodging it – merely protecting myself.
probably, an undirected anger or bitterness still afloat or a rejected feeling that needs to be digested.
what am i running from? could be a who.
I can still vividly remember my dream last night. The most bloodcurdling I ever had.
It started when I looked in the mirror and noticed a handful of hair budding on my left cheek. Without hesitation, took out a tweezers, removed one and noticed a white hair root along. A bit perturb but it didn’t totally kicked in until I plucked one more with a longer root leaving a void on my cheek!
Rushed out to the hospital with a friend. While in the streets, small pieces of colored papers gradually covered the hole.
Woke up shivering.
The heck whatever it insinuates.
Wish I could rub out the image. The goose bumps are irrepressible.
Every ending is a start of a new beginning. Or something like that.
Anyway, looking back at the year’s events somehow made me teary-eyed. Not all expectations were granted but surprising, and a lot better, things happened.
What’s in the store for me? If only I have the ability to foresee. Yes some may be beyond my control. I wouldn’t close my eyes to, hmmm, objectionable matters.
Self-control. Tough. Gotta jot down these so-called oaths (memory dilemma once in a while):
credit card control
forgiving – a done deal. Might as well forget. (ironically speaking with what I wrote above , traumas seem indelible)
shorten, preferably getting rid of, the stuck-up mania
shake off the excess weight as well
Travel. Travel. Travel.
walk down the aisle. Who knows. Haha
learn a new computer program (buy a notebook first habibi)
The list doesn’t end here.
CAIRO – the hustle bustle of this rustic city is one of the fond memories I savored. History is impossible to forget, the must-see creations like the great pyramids, sphinx and the citadel and the likes are enough for people from different nooks of the earth to flock to this place.
One of my favourites was the dhow & peluka cruise at the NileRiver. So relaxing, stress-free and so caught up imagining Moses floating inside the basket on those waters.
We were well-informed on the stories lurking in each site, thanks to our tour guide, Wag a.k.a GAW.
I didn’t dare myself and had no regrets for going only halfway (I thinks so) in the interior of pyramid Cheops. With lots of people going inside competing for the insufficient oxygen made me suffocate. The feeling is indelible. Jeez, I’m feeling suffocated right now
The mummies looked scary. Wonder about the duddies. Corny.
Nothing beats the awe-inspiring place of Old Cairo where the Holy Family resided. It’s situated on the grounds of St. Georges church surrounded the synagogues of Ben Ezra, the Hanging Church and other Coptic Christian synagogues. I may not fully grasp the difficulties of their flight through the freezing weather, unpredictable condition of the route, but it gave me an inch of idea. I was engulfed with emotions and was good in concealing it from my companions. Too bad, no pictures allowed.
Now I know how papyrus paper is made. Did it myself! Browse the pictures for proof and it’s perfume smells good too.
ALEXANDRIA – Guess it right, named after Alexander the Great where he made the metropolis looked like a typical European city. By the way, it was Egypt’s capital prior to Cairo.
The Catacombs of Kom El-Shouqafa under the ground may look boring with ordinary niches but if your imagination kicks in and knows the story behind, it’s beyond fascinating. Since I have a vivid sense of thoughts thus I am fascinating.
It’s also in this city where the Roman colonization left most of its traces like the ruins of amphitheatre.
All these were discovered by chance: donkeys got their feet stuck to the ground. These donkeys deserve a monument too!
Ever wonder about The Castle of Qaitbay? It was built…hmmmm. I kinda forgot. I was only half listening to the tourist guide, this time he was an oldie, Mr. Hassan. Anyway, it’s built facing the Mediterranean Sea.
I prefer Alexandria than Cairo. Trust me.
SINAI – after almost 7 hours in the road, we reached the wonderful city St. Katherine’s.
It was during this trip where we had been in two continents: Asia and Africa. Too bad we couldn’t straddle between two places at the same time. Nah, enough of that A-Walk-To-Remember-thingy. The Suez Canal was the boundary between the two. We passed through a tunnel over the canal.
Somewhere in the middle it hit me that I left my cam’s battery in the hotel. Bummer!
Most of the landmarks are mentioned in the Bible: The Red Sea, Moses’ mountain, the burning bush, golden calf, Aaron’s hill and Moses’ Rock.
Picture this out: two male guides (a Bedouin Egyptian and neophyte Egyptian) with the four “cats” (or spicy girls –as per the Egyptians dubbed us) ascending to Mt.Sinai at the wee hours of the night in a freezing temperature where light was not a privilege.
Bravo for Ayag and me for reaching the summit of Mt.Sinai. The place was full-packed of people of different race. Another glitch: gretel’s cam was memory full and ayag’s was running out of battery.
The body ache was put into oblivion. The view was more than breath-taking, witnessed by people of different race and age.
I’m vain. Or shall I say a conceited fool? Nah, too harsh though synonymous. I’ll stick with vain. When I first heard that from my friends and acquaintances, was red faced. Literally. Not just from embarrassment but anger. After re-reading my blogs, it’s undeniable. Ouch. Like slapping my own face.
Change, forgive, forget and acceptance, such simple words yet elusive. Serenity’s within reach if only this tad of clinging doesn’t dawdle.
I don’t want to be vain.
I had it but out of the blue it slipped. Does it imply that nothing lastingly belongs to anyone?
Not long ago I let the tears fall for the reason I thought it was. Looking at the scars triggers the nasty memories, the same reflection of the present. A skeptic for history repeats itself but why is this happening again?
It’s not keeping hold on the emotion but immersing on the feeling helps. Luckily sanity’s there to get a grip, saving me from drowning.
I’m living in the present fantasizing on the distant future, that is, to surpass all these. Yet everything seems a process.
Standing on the ledge and savoring the thrill.
For a moment, got carried away with the trance, almost knocked me off the ground.
Reality kicked in and it stung.
Torn between going back to the chimera and moving on.
The latter prevailed though it wasn’t easy.
Hope always lingers even it’s against logic or principle.
One of the rare moments where I dread the day ends. I don’t know where to go after leaving the office or parting away from friends.
For the first time, I feel what it’s like to be homeless for I opt to be one.
God won’t give a problem without a solution. There are and within my reach. But the one thing I’m looking for is nowhere to be found. The reason has to sink in.
My head’s wrapped on the next bend.
I condone self pity. Not this time, couldn’t help the tears.
Tik tak says my new POOH watch.
It has been ages since I wore one. When was the last time? Hmmm.. sometime back in high school.
I loved watches. When I was young, had almost all the shapes known to a child: heart, round, triangle, square, star, you name it. All short-lived with one cause: accidentally waterlogged (sometimes, “not so-accidentally”).
Then I got (and still am) imbued with alarm clock. Urgh! How I hate it! Anything associated with clocks seem to make me hurl. It’s one of my least favourites, anything or anyone who stirs me up from my slumber.
Last Thursday, I relived the idea of wearing a watch, almost overwhelmed with the good memories.
Thanks, Pareeeng Ayag – the person who gave the POOH watch as an early birthday present. By the way, she’s a POOH aficionada.
